Falling Into Darkness
by Chaser921
Summary: What happened when Tonks went looking for Remus? How did the two of them meet their respective ends? And who ended up with little Teddy? DH spoilers.


The sitting room was cheery and brightly lit, with a fire crackling pleasantly in the grate. The plump chairs were covered in deep maroon, and fat gold cushions added an extra degree of comfort to the furnishings. A delicious smell wafted in from the nearby kitchen, and a woman could be heard humming a lullaby to a gurgling baby.

Nymphadora Lupin-Tonks' raised voice and agitated movements were a jarring note to her otherwise peaceful surroundings, so much so that her infant son, Teddy Lupin, started to fret in his grandmother's arms.

"Mum, I can't just _stay_ here, not knowing!" Tonks shouted as her mother looked at her accusingly and hushed the baby. "I'm an Auror, I'm used to _fighting_, not waiting calmly at home for my husband!"

"But what about Teddy, Dora? What if neither of you…" Andromeda hesitated and suddenly looked frightened. "… come back?" she finished in a whisper.

Tonks stopped moving abruptly. She rushed across the room to her mother as tears started swimming in Andromeda's eyes. As soon as she reached them, Tonks threw her arms around her mother and son.

"It'll be all right, Mum, we're both experienced fighters, we'll be fine," she soothed, patting Andromeda's back and smoothing Teddy's hair, which had changed from blond to black in the space of a heartbeat.

"I don't want to lose you, too!" Andromeda cried, clutching Tonks to her. The sudden movement set Teddy to howling, and it took Tonks several minutes to quiet both of them. When her mother was relatively calm again, Tonks caught up her cloak and swirled it around her shoulders.

"I have to go," she said simply to her mother, who sighed and nodded.

"I understand," Andromeda replied shakily. "I wanted to go with your father when he fled, but he was afraid I'd get hurt, and wouldn't let me. When I heard he'd been killed – " she paused and swallowed hard. "When I heard, I kept thinking that I could've prevented it from happening if I'd been there, that I could have done _something_ that would have saved him."

Tonks nodded and had just grabbed the doorknob when she felt her mother's hand on her shoulder, stopping her.

"Be careful, Dora," Andromeda said. Tonks turned and hugged her tightly.

"I'll send word when the battle's over," she promised, then stepped outside and Disapparated directly into the Hog's Head.

"Nymphadora Tonks!"

"Who's that? Oh, hullo, Augusta," Tonks said, smiling. She'd always been fond of Neville's gran; she rather hoped she'd be like that when she got old, to tell the truth. Tough old bird, was Augusta Longbottom.

The two women hurried into the tunnel behind the portrait, something they'd both become quite familiar with in the past few months. Augusta sealed the entrance as soon as they stepped inside, and Tonks shot her a questioning look.

"Aberforth's already gone to the castle, and he told me everyone's evacuated from Hogwarts that can. I thought it wise not to leave a hole in our defenses."

Tonks nodded her approval as they climbed into the Room of Requirement, where they found Ginny Weasley. Tonks smiled weakly at Ginny's greeting, her nagging conscience starting to pull at her.

She shouldn't be here. She really shouldn't be here; Remus had told her to stay home with little Teddy, but she couldn't stand it, she just _had_ to make sure that he was all right. She felt a twinge of guilt at the voice whispering that she was choosing her husband over her child, but she suppressed it. She was here now; there wasn't any use in feeling guilty about it.

Ginny opened her mouth, no doubt to ask why Tonks wasn't at her mother's with Teddy, but at that moment, Harry Potter and his two closest friends burst through the door. The three women turned and Augusta immediately began speaking to Harry, who looked hurried and a bit distracted. Tonks didn't blame him; she wanted to rush outside as soon as she could to find Remus. She'd just about decided to go search for him when Augusta left and Harry turned to her.

"I thought you were supposed to be with Teddy at your mother's?" he asked, and his surprise at seeing her brought a rush of guilt crashing down on her.

"I couldn't stand not knowing – she'll look after him – have you seen Remus?" She stammered, anguish etched on every feature.

"He was planning to lead a group of fighters into the grounds – " he began, but she didn't wait to hear the rest, speeding off down the corridor.

A dull roar sounded as something hit the castle, and bits of stone and dust rained down around her as she ran through the trembling castle. The people around her looked like savage ghosts, covered in pale dust and staring around with furious eyes.

She asked everyone she met where she could find Remus, but in all the confusion, no one seemed to have any idea where he was. As she sped back along the corridors, she ran into Ginny at one of the windows, sending hexes at Voldemort's forces.

"All right there, Ginny?" she yelled, sending a few spells of her own at the foe. Ginny pushed her hair out of her eyes and grinned fiercely at her.

"Having the time of my life!" she called back at Tonks as she fired a series of Stunning spells out the window. "Have you found Remus yet?"

Tonks opened her mouth to reply in the negative, but at that moment, Aberforth appeared at the other end of the corridor, heading towards the North Battlements, shouting about giants.

"Have you seen Remus?" Tonks called after him as he passed.

"He was dueling Dolohov," shouted Aberforth, "haven't seen him since!"

The blood drained from her face as she rushed after him through the dust, barely hearing Ginny call after her.

"Aberforth!" she called after him, and he slowed and looked over his shoulder. "Aberforth, where was he fighting?"

"Near the Great Hall," he shouted back.

"Thanks!" she yelled as she swerved and ran through one of the many shortcuts that would take her there. Moments later she emerged just outside the Great Hall, panting slightly and staring around wild-eyed.

"Remus! Remus, where are you!" Tonks screamed, sending jinxes and hexes at every Death Eater she encountered as she tried desperately to see through the chaos. It was almost impossible to find anyone in the fray.

"Dora!" she heard from her left, and changed course without breaking stride as she ran towards his voice.

She saw Remus turn from his duel with Dolohov, shock and fear etched suddenly on his features as he saw her running towards them. Dolohov took advantage of his distraction and shot a spell at his back. It collided with Remus, outlining him in red, and he crumpled where he stood.

"REMUS! Remus, no, no, NO!" Tonks shrieked as she rushed to the spot where he had fallen. Dolohov looked up, grinning at her screams, and she raised her wand almost without thinking. A white-hot rage filled her, rage and despair for the loss of the husband she had only just found.

"_Avada Kedevra!"_ she screamed, and a flash of green illuminated Dolohov's startled features as her curse missed him by inches as he ducked and disappeared into the melee. Weeping, Tonks threw herself on Remus's still form.

"Remus, Remus, you weren't supposed to die, you were supposed to come home!" she sobbed, and felt him stir feebly. "Remus!"

"And…you…were…s'posed…to…stay…there," he breathed, a faint smile on his lips. She bent down and kissed him softly as the battle raged around them and curses split the air. But they were detached from all that, it didn't matter anymore. As long as his lips moved against hers, there was still a chance… but then they stilled, and she felt his life drain from him as his head fell back and he went limp in her arms.

A rushing noise filled her ears as she buried her face in his lifeless chest. She felt as if she were falling, falling into darkness, into a black abyss where nothing lived but grief and agony. Nothing mattered anymore, nothing, all she could feel was pain, and a huge hole where her heart should have been. Time seemed to slow to the point of stopping, and the battle around her became a blur of movement and noise. A harsh, screaming wail ripped itself out of her throat as she clutched his body; she couldn't stop it, and didn't care to.

"Hey, Crabbe, it's Bellatrix's cousin, the one with the pink hair! Looks like her werewolf lover's snuffed it!"

She heard the words as if from far away, and coarse laughter seemed to echo in her ears as someone grabbed Remus' legs and tried to jerk him out of her grasp. At the same time, two heavy hands landed on her shoulders and tried to drag her to her feet.

Her eyes flew open as time speeded up again, and she shot a Stunner at the man at Remus' feet even as she slammed an elbow into the person holding her shoulders. He grunted and doubled over, letting go of her. She turned and moved her wand like a whip.

"_Flagrate!"_ she shouted hoarsely, and a line of fire flew out of her wand and wrapped itself around the tall, hulking, Death Eater. He screamed and tried beating his hands against the flames, but Tonks had already turned away from him to the battle raging around her.

She stood over Remus, her dark eyes deepening to pitch and her hair flaring black and wild around her shoulders as she took in her surroundings. Remus had fallen near the entrance to the Great Hall, and Death Eaters and Order members were fighting all around them.

And she laughed, she laughed as she killed those who had killed her family, had killed her father, had killed her husband. Tears ran down her cheeks like rain as she laughed, dripping onto the face of the husband that lay beneath her, the husband she was protecting and avenging. Her hair, black as the spaces between stars, as black as her despair, stood out around her head like a corona as she sent Death on swift wings to all that opposed her.

She could barely see, her tears and her rage blinded her; it was all she could do to distinguish the Death Eaters from her allies, but she shot Death at them anyway. She wanted them to know what Death was, how painful it was. She wanted them to know her pain, her grief, her loss. She wanted them to burn and freeze and be ripped apart as she was.

But it could not continue. Death Eaters ran at her and she killed them as they came, until she drew the attention of one as powerful as she, as mad as she, but for different reasons. Eventually, one of her aunt's curses finally broke through Tonks' defenses and she fell beside her husband, a smile played about her lips, the remnant of the mad laughter that had possessed her when her husband died.

Now, though, in her final moments, her mind was clear, painfully clear, and she was able to cast one last spell, whispering words that would sound after her death, words that would carry her love to the last of her family. And with that final spell, Nymphadora Lupin-Tonks breathed her last breath, her features calm and her hair reverting to the short, spiky pink she wore when she was happy, and at peace.

Andromeda Tonks stared determinedly out of the kitchen window, as if she could see through the night to the battle happening so far away.

Little Teddy shouted from his playpen, and Andromeda hurried over to him and picked him up as a huge silver wolf soared into the room. She backed up, clutching Teddy, but then relaxed as she realized that it was Nymphadora's Patronus. The battle must be over! Her baby was safe!

"Oh, thank goodness!" she exclaimed, trying her best to hush Teddy, who had started crying on her shoulder.

The wolf cocked its head at her, its eyes morose and sad, before opening its mouth.

"Take care of Teddy for us, Mum," Tonks' voice whispered into the sudden stillness that came over the room. "I love you both…"

Her Patronus faded into smoke as Andromeda's wails mingled with the cries of her now orphaned grandson.

Deathly Hallows, UK edition pgs 501-503


End file.
